[As I was writing, I realized I wrote a very similar post a couple of weeks ago. But, that's okay. It takes time to figure this stuff out; nothing will be solved overnight, even for lil' Miss Type A.]
So let's just take a wild swing and say that maybe life isn't perfect. Maybe the specifics aren't exactly what you had originally assumed.
Do you say 'Fuck it, this isn't from a fairytale and goddamn-it, I deserve that fairytale, picket fence and all.' Or, do you look at what you have, take a deep breath, and appreciate things for what they are?
Assuming the good outweighs the bad (and yes, that's a big assumption, one that has to be decided over and over), I vote for Door Number 2.
But then, you're still not satisfied, right? There's not much you don't enjoy, per-say, but there's still stuff missing... and so rather than live a life that feels slightly less than right, why don't you look to add to what you already have?
It's not conventional; it's definitely not the original Cinderella-story. But maybe, just maybe, it leaves room to have everything you want without forcing any one person into an unyielding box. And maybe, it alleviates the tendency toward codependency.
Granted, details are difficult; I don't know exactly how tough I am, but I think I'm ready to find out.
1 comments:
It is extremely, extremely difficult to differentiate between what your inner soul really wants and what you have been conditioned to want (achieve or accumulate things that 'others' see as important or keys to success). I mention it because I am 46 and am miserable. I feel as if many of my achievements in life were made to make other people happy or impressed. Things like a 'way too big' Townhome, BMW Convertible, Zegna suits,huge 401k, girlfriends I dated, wife I married and divorced, an overpaying job that required zero challenges. All of these "things" were why I went to work at age 29 and 36 and 41....and now reality hits. I did way too many things in life to please or accomodate what I thought others felt would make me happy. And so now at 46 I am forced to make changes , I am forced to make myself see what I want . What are my passions ? Do I do triathlons to impress others ? Is this job really worth it for the $ ?
Hoefully you can go with your 'gut' better than I did.
Take care.
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