Just finished practicing for the day, and definitely feel like I could use a beer. Practicing is very hard work; no wonder I avoid it. :)
I'm going to Philadelphia tomorrow to have a lesson with Khaner. I feel pretty ready, although I'm sure I'll get my butt kicked anyway. I guess that's kind of the point though.
Thank you all for the encouraging words after my last blog entry. People sent an outpouring of emails and hello messages. Don't worry, guys--it wasn't any one specific person or comment. Just a general feeling that I'm spending too much of my time fighting hurt feelings. I've been feeling like I'm in middle school again, which is kind of silly, considering I'm now 23. So, really I was talking about how I need to fix myself, not criticizing any one person. But...it's nice to know I'm loved, all the same. Thanks.
Due to an email conversation with a dear friend, I've been thinking about how so much of the population spends the majority of their life behind a desk or working in some environment that they don't enjoy. I can't even partially imagine it, and that makes me feel really guilty. Who am I to think I'm special enough to avoid what everyone else has to do? I know there is a give and take relationship--if you work, you have a sense of security and you (hopefully!) ultimately have more means to do what you want to do in the long run. Whereas if you do what I do, and just work enough to scrape by, then you don't have the stability, but you do have your time. For now, I'm happy with my decision. Of course that may change as I 'grow up' and have a family, but for now, I know I would go crazy having to work for 8 hours a day, 5 days a week--and I'm happy that I'm able to manage the way I am. The dream, of course, would be to be able to support yourself fully by doing what you want (in my case, playing in an orchestra), but meanwhile I just have to make sure I remember that I did in fact make a choice...I could be making more money if that was my goal. SO...I'm going to attempt to curb the complaining about money for the time being. It's not really fair to complain about something you have control over, right?
And to all you workers out there--it's your choice too. If you want to work all day, I applaud you, because I know it would be really hard for me. But, if you want your time back...RUN FOR THE DOOR...enjoy the sunshine.
4 comments:
You are a raging alcoholic. I might have to intervene.
giggles at danb's comment.
some people cannot EVER, EVER work a 9-5, me being one of them:). so, here i go RUNNING FOR THE DOOR, ejoying the sunshine, even though it's 55 degrees out:(.
i think it's important to be authentic in your pursuits, even if it means putting a steady pay check.
you should be proud of yourself.
I've always believed since people spend much of their time "working," you should do something that makes you smile.
Drunkard.
my friend pointed me to your blog after she found it by googling dwight parry. btw, that night was the final cut of the auditions, but he didn't win it.
I was surprised to see him there too. he was in my quintet @ usc my freshman year.
anyway, i'm a flutist too! I'm going to be entering grad school...
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